


Last Gem Standing

by 88_MAGNETIC_DOG_88



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Connie Maheswaran/Peridot Friendship, Everybody Dies, Friendship, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Implied Amethyst/Peridot (Steven Universe), Implied Connie Maheswaran/Steven Universe, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Major character death - Freeform, Suicide, Swearing, Well...almost everybody, multiple character death
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-05
Updated: 2017-02-17
Packaged: 2018-09-22 04:12:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 12,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9583073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/88_MAGNETIC_DOG_88/pseuds/88_MAGNETIC_DOG_88
Summary: After all of the Crystal Gems, Steven and Lapis included, have died, Peridot is left jaded and depressed.However, she soon finds herself forming a strong friendship with Connie Maheswaran.The current length of this fanfic is undetermined, and will be figured out as I write out.New, heavy parts to the story may also be added on as time goes on.This story diverges from canon after the events of Gem Harvest.





	1. Prologue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prologue to the story.

One month. It all happened in only one month. With one clean sweep, all of the Crystal Gems. Dead. Never to be revived.

First it had happened one misty February morning, where all had been peaceful and quiet, if a little bit dreary. An alien ship had landed on soil of Beach City, and out strode a band of five towering, muscled quartz soldiers. Citrines and tangerine quartzes, to be very exact. They all shared the common diamond uniform, which specified their belonging to Yellow Diamond. On the beach, ready to fight, stood Pearl, Garnet, Amethyst, and one gem not a part of the Crystal Gems: Lapis Lazuli. Behind a rather tall rock hid Steven and Peridot.

The fight began, and with little move or provocation, Pearl and Amethyst were both reduced to their mere gemstones, and shattered into pieces by the heels of two citrines. Out of rage, Garnet sprinted at the soldiers and with fierce blows had managed to destroy the forms of all five gems, with the assistance of Lapis Lazuli and her hydrokinesis. Lapis took the five gemstones and broke them with her fists. 

Soon, behind Peridot and Lapis’ barn, a memorial was in the making. The bubbled shards or Pearl and Amethyst were placed thoughtfully behind the building, with homemade graves with their names written on them. Peridot in particular would hold onto Amethyst’s bubble and stare wistfully at it, her hands trembling.

The very next week, a ship like the one before came once again, landing in the same place. Garnet and Lapis Lazuli arrived to fight, and Steven once again hid behind a tall rock. Peridot was nowhere in sight.

This time, it had been six soldiers. There were two citrines, two carnelians, and two tangerine quartzes. The six of them fused into one large soldier, one that would possibly rival the size of a diamond. Garnet and Lapis attempted to fight the fusion, but there was too much of a power imbalance for the two of them to win.

Garnet was split apart, reduced to two red and blue gemstones, and then broken into pieces. Lapis had attempted to fight, but her powers were rendered useless toward such a massive, powerful being. Held in the giant hand of the fusion, she was told she would be brought back to Homeworld, put on trial, and then executed. She was taken into the ship by the massive fusion, and within minutes, the ship was gone, flying away into the cosmos.

 Gathering the shards of Garnet, or to be precise, Ruby and Sapphire, Steven ran back to the barn in tears.

He arrived at the door and saw it be opened slowly and hastily, to reveal Peridot, still sad, possibly over Amethyst’s fate more than Pearl’s.

Once she had learned what had happened to Garnet and Lapis, she had slammed the door in his face. Inside, he could hear her screams, crashes and bangs, the destruction of many, many objects inside the building. She was destroying it all, one by one, out of pure rage and grief.

He had never seen or heard Peridot act like this. It frightened him immensely, to the point where he considered running away.

But then, he heard the destruction cease. Then came the sound of her, Peridot, sobbing quietly.

Wiping away his own tears, he opened the door and walked in. There she was, on her knees, sobbing into her hands.

There was mud everywhere. Pieces of broken glass and technology scattered around the floor. There were shredded bits of Lapis’ favorite leaf lying on the floor next to her. There were large broken chunks of porcelain from the toilets in front of her, and water spraying from the plumbing of two of them. There were holes in the walls, and pieces of wood on the floor. 

Steven walked up to her, and kneeled down next to her. He hugged her, in his attempt to be comforting.

Over the next few weeks, Steven had become very gloomy and reclusive, a stark contrast to his usual jovial demeanor. He was heartbreaking to listen to, dismal to watch. Peridot and Greg made their very best attempts to cheer him up and help him come out of his shell. But…he was beyond help, too miserable, after losing the only motherly figures he’d ever had in his life. His father, yes, he was still there, but after being taken in by the gems, he’d barely gotten times where he could bond with him. He had simply been too busy.

With all of his trauma from battles against Homeworld and the loss of those he’d held dear, life itself had just become too tiresome to live. 

One day, Peridot had crept into Steven’s house. She flipped on the light switch near the door, noticing it had been flipped off. Stepping around all the dirty clothes and broken objects she called out his name.

“Steven! Steven! Are you here? I have something for you!”

The box she was holding was a present, just for him. The least she could do was be generous.

Inside the box, there was necklace made from seashells, strung together by Peridot herself.

She noticed two note held to the fridge with a magnet. She walked around the counter and pulled the note off the fridge, and put her present on the counter, beginning to read it. The handwriting, she noticed was rather sloppy. It looked like the person writing had been in severe hurry.

\--

_Whoever gets this letter is who it will be addressed to. If you’re reading this, then don’t come and look for me._

_My name is Steven Universe. I’m 14 years old, and I was born here in Beach City._

_My mom, Rose Quartz, was a gem. An alien. My dad, Greg Universe, was a human. I’m a human-gem hybrid. I’m not normal_

_I’ve been thinking about things like that a lot lately, and I’ve decided that I don’t want to deal with this anymore._

_The gems, Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl, have all been shattered. The three of them were the closest things I ever had to actual moms. My friend Lapis is about to be shattered, too._

_I’ve been forced to hurt people that I wanted to save and make friends with._

_I’ve found out that my mom shattered Pink Diamond, and all of the other horrible things she did in the gem war._

_I’ve been socially isolated from my dad, and my best friend, Connie, the last close connections I had to humanity._

_I’ve been captured and beaten. I’ve been hurt by my family. The gems, who aren’t even here anymore, wanted me to be more like my mom, and I bet sometimes even wished I wasn’t there, and that they had her instead._

_But, I can’t be like Rose. I just can’t. We aren’t the same person._

_\--_

Peridot flipped over the page.

\-- 

_To be honest, I’m just tired. Of everything. I want all of this to be over._

_I can’t even see Rose Quartz as my mom anymore. Now, she’s just this dark figure looking over me. She’s disappointed in me._

_I can’t deal with having to hurt innocent people. I can’t deal with all the lies. I can’t deal with everything that’s being taken away from me. I can’t deal with all of this loneliness._

_That’s why I’m doing this. I’m gonna end all of this before it can get any worse, and I’m never coming back._

_If you’re still reading this, then don’t be sad. It was probably for the better. This world doesn’t need me anymore, and it probably never needed me if I was such a big mistake._

_Please don’t tell my dad. Losing Rose Quartz hurt him enough. Please don’t tell Connie either. I was her only friend, and it would break her heart to hear this. I don’t want anybody to worry. I’d like it better if I quietly disappeared, and nobody noticed._

_If you do tell them, then at least add in that I said I’d always love them, even though I won’t be here anymore, and that I’m sorry for causing them any pain._

_You can stop reading now; I don’t have anything else to say._

_Goodbye._

_\- Steven_

\--

Peridot slowly put down the letter, trembling. She held one hand over her mouth. There were tears streaming down her face.

This was it. This was the last straw.

Now Steven was gone too.

How he did it, she didn’t want to imagine. If he had used a weapon or overdosed, he’d still be in the house, lying down on the floor. If he’d jumped off a cliff, she would’ve seen it on her way to the temple. He must have drowned himself in the ocean. Though that wasn’t particularly something she wanted to think about.

But, all she knew, was that he was gone. Just like the others.

She covered her eyes. She tried to wipe away her tears. But, she couldn’t stop them from coming.

For the following days, Peridot tried every single way she could find to destroy her physical form.

She thought it’d end the pain somehow. She thought someone would come across her gemstone by itself and crush it. She thought she could disappear. What would be the point of continuing her existence? All of her friends were lost. She was the last Crystal Gem left. Her, a simple peridot. She didn’t want to let herself be the last. She didn’t want to disgrace the name. At the very least, she wanted to be the last one to die. Then, she wouldn’t have to worry about destroying an ancient legacy.

But, she couldn’t die. It never happened. She always came back. It came to the point where she was numb to regenerating. She didn’t have to put much effort into a new form, because she knew it didn’t matter.

It took a long, long time, but she became numb to her grief too. Or maybe she’d begun repressing her emotions, and she hadn’t become aware.

Once she had calmed down, she began putting herself to use. She began to rebuild the interior of the barn. She added extra rooms, and tunneled underground to build an armory.

Upstairs, she made the barn more like a typical human’s home. She bought regular household appliances. She bought an oven and stove, a microwave, trays and seats, a refrigerator, dressers. She built cupboards and installed a sink. She bought pots, pans kitchen utensils, and a teakettle. She bought a new TV and placed it on top of a table next to the left wall. She used some of the two paint cans as small tables, and put a lamp on one and a radio she bought on the other. She bought a green couch and a carpet. The couch could double as a soft bed.

She had vowed to herself that if she ever found a sick or injured human by herself, she take them into the barn and care for them. She wanted to start caring more about humans. It would’ve been what Steven and the gems had wanted.

She started doing research on humans, learning how the human body works, what it needs, and how to treat it. She learned every human language she could, and was mildly surprised at how well she could do it.

She learned how to cook. She learned how to knit and sew. She learned how to treat wounds and bought medicine and supplies for treating disease.

She made herself go out and socialize with the humans in Beach City, despite how much she really didn’t want to. She developed a friendship with Greg.

She made herself care, and eventually, she did start caring.

Peridot, the gem who had joined the Crystal Gems over a year ago, had now finally begun to care about the very species that populated the Earth. Now the entire planet had mattered to her, rather then just the resources and potential lying within it.


	2. The Hooded Figure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Connie meets a mysterious figure when she visits Steven's house.

Inside of the house, just as he’d left it, Steven’s phone would still ring. Some of the calls were from concerned Beach City citizens, some of the calls were from his father, who’d progressively get more and more stressed over his son’s silence. Some of the calls were from Connie Maheswaran, who had yet to learn of Steven and the gems’ fates, and had simply just come to the conclusion that they had gone into outer space to fight battles with Homeworld, and save the Earth from invasion and destruction.

…But, if that were the case, she would’ve been told so, wouldn’t she?

Every time Connie had found out that Steven and the gems were going on an intergalactic mission, she found out through Steven himself. He’d always give her a call beforehand, and he’d tell her he’d be back soon.

But where was Steven now? Had he just lost his phone? He’d never purposefully ignore a call. Not unless the circumstances were dire.

Connie wanted to believe nothing bad had happened to her dearest, closest friend, but now she feared that had been the case.

One day on a rainy April afternoon, Connie hopped off the school bus, wearing a blue rain poncho, carrying her backpack. She walked into her house, greeted her parents, and got herself a good snack to eat. While doing her homework inside her room, she kept frantically dialing Steven’s number on her phone, hoping at some point there’d be an answer. But, each time she called, there was the same robotic voice of a woman telling her that the number was not in service and to try calling again. 

And so, she would keep calling. She was so used to dialing Steven’s number, that when she tried to call her mother while walking out of the house to go to Beach City, she mistakenly dialed Steven’s number, rather than the number she intended. She eventually dialed the right number, and told her mother that the reason she asked to leave the house was to check up on Steven, as she was getting desperately worried about him.

Eventually, she reached Beach City. Eventually, she reached the temple.

She walked up the wooden stairs, which were now more dangerous than usual. There were holes in every step, a loud creak with every set of a foot. She nearly fell down, because one wooden step had caved through, leaving her nowhere to stand.

When she finally reached the top of the stairs and the front of the door, she noticed that Steven’s house had been boarded up. The glasses on the windows were broken, and the door was busted, half-opened.

She knocked on a wooden board and called out his name.

“Steven? Are you in there? It’s me, Connie!”

She waited before adding on.

“You, uh, never responded to any of my calls! So I came here to check, and see i-if you’re alright!”

You could hear the stress in her voice, how much she was truly concerned for his being. It was a true pity that she never knew that nobody would answer her, that nobody could answer her.

She waited anxiously for a few more minutes before she would yell his name.

“STEVEN! If this is supposed to be some kind of joke, then it’s NOT FUNNY!”

She waited a few more minutes. She was ready to yell his name again, but before she could, she heard a new, unfamiliar voice.

When the voice spoke, it was high, cold, and raspy. It almost sounded robotic.

“Who are you, little human?”

Connie turned in the direction where she’d first heard the voice.

Next to her stood a figure that was no taller than her, wearing a cloak of the deepest, darkest black, which draped over its body. Its clothes were not visible, and all that could be seen of its face was a mouth and chin.

What little Connie could see of the figure’s face made her feel more threatened. Its face appeared long and narrow. Its chin was pointed. When it began to speak, she would notice the sharp fangs in its mouth, and she would have stressful visions of the figure threatening to eat her for its supper. 

What she could see of its skin that wasn’t in the shadows, appeared gray, or a muted, muddy shade of green.

It spoke to her once again.

“Answer my question, little human. Who are you, and what is your purpose for passing in this area?”

Connie, noticing the angered tone in the figure’s voice, made quick to respond.

“I-I need to talk to Steven Universe! He’s the person who lives in this house! He’s my best friend. Can you let me in to talk to him? Please, I’m so worried about him.”

The figure hesitated responding, as if it were thinking, or processing her words.

“He is not here,” It droned on. “Take your business somewhere else.”

“But,” Connie replied frantically. “But, th-this is HIS house! I can’t think of anywhere else he’d BE! Where is he? PLEASE tell me!”

“He is not here,” The figure repeated in the same robotic tone. “Take your business somewhere else.”

“NO,” Connie yelled back. “I’M NOT LEAVING UNTIL YOU TELL ME WHERE STEVEN IS!”

The figure seemed to wince when Connie raised her voice, but quickly regained it’s stoic demeanor, and formed a new response.

“This area is restricted. You have no right to pass here.”

“WHY NOT?”

In a fit of anger and stress, Connie turned to violently grab the handle to the front door, but not before the figure reached out a small hand to seize her arm and pull her out of the way.

That was the intention, at least. To pull her out of the way. But, it was so hard to see in the rain.

What was meant to be a simple seize of the arm and a pull away from the door, had turned into a throw off the terrace, and it watched. The figure watched in horror as the child fell to the ground, many pieces of wood falling with her. 

The figure quickly leaped off of the balcony to check the now unconscious Connie for a pulse. It was relieved to find that she was still alive and breathing. 

The hooded figure scooped up Connie in its arms and ran away into the rain, hoping that when it reached it’s destination, it wouldn’t be too late to save the little girl it had so mistakenly abused.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had some influence from Edgar Allen Poe's work when writing this chapter, specifically from his poem, "The Raven". I hope you guys enjoy this chapter, because this is where the story starts to kick off!


	3. Welcome to the Barn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Connie wakes up in a barn and meets Peridot.

2 hours passed, and then with a start, Connie was woken up with a spray of cold water onto her face. She opened her eyes; vision blurred, and wiped away the water with her hands.

Once the scene became clear to her, she saw the same hooded figure from before, leaning over her, gripping a small, wet, rolled up towel. 

The figure sat up and lowered the towel. Its mouth formed a weak, but genuine smile. “It’s good to see you awake. Please make yourself at home.”

Connie sat up and observed. There were small spots of mud on her clothes. Her pant legs had been rolled up, and the lower half of her right leg had been wrapped up in a homemade cast. On the cast a small message had been written. Connie leaned herself forward and squinted to read it. “I’m sorry I hurt you,” it read. 

Connie looked up at the hooded figure, which had now walked away, and was stirring ingredients in a cooking pot on a stovetop. 

She wasn’t sure if she truly trusted this figure, but, if it truly had mal any intent, it wouldn't have been so nice as to wrap her leg in a cast, or to rest her down on a bed like the one she was sitting on at the moment.

She observed the bed.

It was surprisingly soft. The blanket, which was bright blue, was rather velvety and feathery. The pillow was just a normal pillow, nothing particularly special about it. 

She looked back at the figure, who was now taste testing its soup from the pot. Was the soup made for Connie? She couldn’t make assumptions; she still hadn’t even seen the full face of this figure. She still wasn’t sure if she could truly trust it, so she decided she should ask it some question.

“How…do I know I can trust you? You’re not going to hurt me, are you?”

The figure turned its head, and spoke in its high, raspy voice. “I’m not going to hurt you. I have no intent of hurting humans, especially not innocent children like you. I wouldn’t call myself a saint, but I have no ill will towards you and your kind." 

“You…aren’t human?”

“Of course I’m not human. I would know if I was.” 

The figure used the ladle it held to pour the soup carefully into a red bowl. 

It set the bowl on a legged tray. It picked a cup, presumably of tea next to the tray, opened up a cupboard above the stove and pulled out a jar of honey. The cup of tea was set to the top left of the bowl of soup, and the figure opened the jar and poured a bit of honey into the tea. It closed the jar, set it next to the tray. It stirred the tea with a spoon, and wiped the spoon with the same towel from earlier. Once the spoon was set down near the honey, the figure set something on the tray next to the bowl, and then it picked up the tray.

The figure turned around and walked over to Connie on the bed, and set the tray down in front of her.

Connie looked down at the tray; there was bowl of brown soup that had mushrooms and onions in it. Next to the bowl, a soupspoon had been laid down, along with a fork. Next to the utensils, there were slices of pineapple, honeydew, cantaloupe, and oranges placed over a cut paper towel. The tea still had leaves resting in it’s liquid.

The figure sat down on its knees and leaned over as if it were bowing. “This is Miyabi soup with mint tea and fruit. I put some honey in the tea if you don’t mind it. Please enjoy.” 

Connie hastily picked up the soupspoon and dipped it into the soup. She raised it up and took a sip. It…was, much to her disbelief, delicious. Despite the figure’s assurance of it being trustworthy, she had still expected some sort of poison in the soup. She took more sips of the soup, just to ease her doubt of it being poison.

…No, she was still alive. The soup was still lovely, albeit hot. She was sure she might have burned her tongue.

Connie picked up the cup of tea and took a sip. The tea was hot too, but it tasted it good. Mint and honey was a weirdly tasty flavor combination. The tea wasn’t poisonous, either.

But, what about the fruit?

She stabbed a pineapple slice with her fork and ate the fruit. No poison or weird flavors to be found in the fruit.

Now that Connie had inspected everything, she could enjoy the meal given to her with no stress.

While she was drinking the last of her soup, the figure spoke again, sitting up.

“Would you feel safer around me if I revealed my face to you?”

Connie set down the bowl on the tray and wiped her mouth. “Yes, I would.” 

The figure raised its head, grabbing the hood of its cloak with its gloved hands, and lifted to reveal an unfamiliar face. Their face was long and narrow, just as Connie had suspected. They had bright green skin, a small, pointed nose, and wore a translucent yellow visor, which tinted the upper half of their face. They had a dark green triangular gemstone place on their forehead. Their blond hair was styled into the shape of a triangle, which had put off Connie at first, but after a few seconds, she decided it didn’t look too bad.

 This gem had a rather disheveled look to them. Though their hair was blond, it was the whiter kind of blond, and it was split at the ends. It looked as if it’d gotten lighter than used to have been. Their eyes appeared tired and lifeless, with bags under them, as if they hadn’t slept in ages. But, a gem doesn’t need sleep now, do they? It was most certainly stress of some sort.

Although Connie didn’t know who this was, she recognized her as a gem, perhaps a friend of Steven’s.

“What’s your name?” She asked.

“I’m Peridot,” The gem replied.

…Peridot. So, this was Peridot. Steven had mentioned her multiple times before, but the two of them had never gotten to officially meet.

“Thank you for the meal, Peridot,” Connie said. “It’s nice to meet you.”

Connie picked up the cup of tea and drank from it.

She had about a sip left before she heard Peridot’s voice speak.

“Are there any ways that I can treat you? Do you need any pain medicine?”

“Oh,” Connie replied. “No thanks. I’m fine. I think I might’ve just sprained by ankle when I fell. I’m not in any serious pain." 

“Well,” Peridot said, standing up. “Call if you need anything. I’ll be outside.”

She threw the hood over her head again and walked to the door. She’d almost left before a loud ring came from the pocket of Connie’s poncho.

Peridot bent down and unbuttoned the pocket, pulling out Connie’s phone.

She read the name of the caller. “Pree…yonkah…Ma-hee-sway-run? Who is this person, little human? Do you know them?”

“That’s my mom, and it’s pronounced ‘Muh-hay-shwoh-run.’” 

“Ah yes, human children have mothers now, don’t they? I handle this, don’t worry.”

The call started from the other side of the phone, and Peridot could hear Connie’s mother yelling in panic. “CONNIE? WHERE ARE YOU? IT’S BEEN 2 HOURS! ARE YOU OKAY?”

“Ahem,” Peridot began. “Mrs. Maheswaran, my name is Peridot. Your daughter is injured at the moment, and I’m caring for her. Please don’t worry, she’s been fed, and her injuries have been treated, she’s in good hands. I will take her back to your home when she’s fully healed. Goodbye.”

Peridot cut off the call before Connie’s mother could start yelling about some random stranger taking away her daughter to “treat her.” 

“Uh,” Connie called back to Peridot. “I don’t think my mom is going to handle that very well.”

“Calm down, Maheswaran. She sounded happy to me. I’m going outside now. Remember to call me if you need anything!”

Peridot placed the phone back on Connie’s poncho, opened the door, and stepped out into the rain, closing the door behind her.

Eating the last slice of fruit she had on her tray, Connie lifted up the tray and turned over to place it on the floor, trying to move her right leg as little as possible.

She looked back to the door, and began to wonder if after this night, she would see Peridot again, and get to know her more as a gem.

The thought of what happened to Steven came back to her, and once again, she was worried for him. Perhaps Peridot had some answers to the question of what had become of him. But Connie would have to wait and find that out when Peridot came back.


	4. A Story of Grief...What Ever Happened to Our Friends?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peridot tells Connie what happened to Steven, and takes her back to home.

Come 8:00PM, Connie began to feel drowsy. Usually, this was around the time she would go to bed. However, she couldn't let herself sleep just yet. She had no idea how long Peridot intended to let her stay in the barn. She wasn't planning to be thrown out in the rain at 3:00AM without warning. She didn't want something like that to happen.

She'd ask to leave, but Peridot was still outside, and there was still information Connie needed from her.

Before she heard the barn door open, she was nearly asleep. The sound of the door slamming shut, coupled with the thunderous sounds of the storm outside, shocked her so much she'd nearly fallen out of the bed.

Peridot stepped into the barn and pulled off the hood of her cloak. After wringing out the mud and water from the cloth, she flung off her cloak and hung it up on a coat rack that stood to the right of the door. On the coat rack, there was also a green winter jacket with a feathered interior, and another cloak different from her black one. The cloak was midnight blue with long, draping sleeves; hood and body held together by a minty blue string. The hood, cuffs, and the train of the cloak were lined carefully with a fancy cyan floral pattern. It seemed a bit too large to fit small gem like Peridot, but it was pretty to look at.

With the cloak off, Connie could now see what Peridot's outfit looked like.

She sported a long, black shawl that reached down to her elbows and stomach; a silvery green star was place above its ruffles. She wore midnight green gloves that stretched from her shoulders to her fingertips, covering both of her arms entirely. Under the shawl, she appeared to be wearing an emerald green leotard with midnight green leggings that covered her legs from hip to toe. On her feet, she wore black ballerina flats.

It was a pretty outfit. It suited her. But the subject of Peridot's taste in fashion was straying away from what Connie was truly concerned about. She'd just recalled her concern for Steven, and had to start asking Peridot questions about him as soon as she could.

Peridot walked over to the bed and bowed to Connie, as if she were in the face of royalty. "Hello, Maheswaran. It's nice to see you're still in good health."

"Peridot," Connie began. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Oh," Peridot smiled, clapping her hands together. "Of course you can! Ask me anything you'd like!"

Connie paused for a minute and then asked the very question that'd been nagging at her for month.

"Peridot...what happened to Steven?"

...One question. One question, and within seconds, Peridot's eager smile had dropped, she was now frowning in horror. Her eyes were wide with shock and terror, and began to dart back and forth as she attempted to formulate a response. But, all she could do was form short broken words and incomplete sentences. She was stuttering as if she was being taught how to talk, rather than already having a full grasp on the english language.

"Well...I. H-he. He...he, um...I...i-it's. U-uh. He...he, err...h-h-he d-didn't-"

"He didn't _what?"_ Connie asked with exasperation. "Tell me."

Peridot covered her mouth with her fists. "I...I can't," She muttered pitifully. "H-he never w-wanted me...t-too..."

"Why not?"

"He...kn-knew you'd be...u-upset..."

"Who cares about how _**I**_ feel? I'm worried about **_Steven_** _!"_

"H... _he_ cares..."

" _Please_ just tell me what happened. I've been so worried for the last few months, I just want to know if he's _okay_."

Peridot shrunk down, attempting, and failing, to hide her face from Connie. Her eyes were getting misty, and her voice was so quiet it was barely above a whisper. "Please...j-just change the s-subject...I...I can't..."

"TELL ME ALREADY!" Connie yelled. "PLEASE!"

Peridot covered her eyes entirely, and shrunk so low she fell on the floor on her knees by accident.

Connie heard Peridot mutter an answer under her breath, but couldn't quite make it out.

Hoping for a louder response, she asked, "What did you say?"

Peridot sniffled, and lowered her hands to reveal her face was covered with tears. She didn't repeat herself, but merely looked up at Connie in silent pity.

Connie asked the question again, this time louder and clearer. _"What did you say?"_

Peridot covered her eyes again. "He...h-he," she blubbered.

"Peridot," Connie said, her voice louder, and her tone more irritated than before. "Talk to me."

Still no response. All there was to hear was unintelligible sobbing.

"PERIDOT!" Connie yelled, leaning over and grabbing Peridot's hands. "TALK!"

Peridot looked down. "O-okay, he," she sniveled. "H-he..."

Connie leaned closer. "WHAT? HE _WHAT? **WHAT HAPPENED?** "_

 _" **HE KILLED HIMSELF!** " _Peridot wailed.

Connie sat back, horror-struck. "No," she said. "No...he didn't. He wouldn't. W-why would he do that?"

Peridot, in an attempt to regain her composure, wiped away her tears and breathed. She got up an walked over to the counter by the oven and stove. Out of a drawer, she pulled out a note, and handed to Connie once she'd reached the bed.

Connie read the note over once. She read it over twice. She read it three times. Even after the fifth time reading, she was still in disbelief.

This was _Steven's_ handwriting. Exactly how _he_ wrote. This was what _Steven_ would tell her at times when he felt at his lowest. Nearly _word for word_. She was reading the suicide note of closest, most dearest friend in the world. Her _only_ friend in the world.

Connie felt as if right at this moment, she was living in a new world. A different world. Perhaps a bad vision of Garnet's. All of this information at once...it felt so unreal.

...She had to be sure. She had to know if this was really him. She needed some kind of indisputable evidence. Something she couldn't doubt.

"Peridot, take me to the temple," Connie demanded. "Now."

"Okay," Peridot sniffled. "Let me g-get my cloak."

In front of the door, Connie put on her blue poncho, and Peridot threw on the black cloak, hood up and all.  
  
The two of them ran outside to the rain, and Peridot beckoned Connie to come over to the side of the barn.

There, Connie saw Greg's old van. He must've lent it to Peridot, possibly after finding a place to live in.

The two of them took the front seats, and Peridot started the engine with the key.

" _You_ know how to drive?" Connie asked her.

"I learned how to," Peridot replied, wiping away her tears from before. "I have my own license of driving."

She pulled her license out of a cloak pocket and held it up for Connie to read.

Connie read through the information on the license, and out everything else, the one bit of trivia that stuck out to her was Peridot's age, which the license had listed as being 30 years old. "Peridot, you're thirty years old? I thought gems didn't age, though."

"They don't," Peridot responded casually. "It just so happens I was made thirty years ago, roughly equivalent to your 'January 8th, 1987.'"

"Oh," Connie marveled, smiling. "So, you're a capricorn!"

Peridot frowned with bemusement. "Cappa-what? Oh, never mind. Let's just...get to the temple."

Having already started the car with the key, Peridot began to drive through the rain.

As the ride went on, the windshields would wipe the window again and again, attempting to keep the rain off.

It was hard to see with the night having gone dark. It wasn't easier when you saw the world through a green tint due to your visor's coloring.

Peridot had nearly crashed into trees and rocks multiple times. Each time, Connie would cross her fingers, praying for her life.

Once they had reached Beach City, and then the temple, the two of them were able to put their worries at ease.

Connie stepped out of the vehicle and looked up at the temple. The house was still boarded up, and the stairs were still in pieces.

She crept closer to the stairs, Peridot following her like a shadow.

Connie was about to set her foot on the stairs, until she heard Peridot say coldly and robotically, "Don't."

Peridot wrapped her arms tightly around Connie's waist, and jumped up into the air, carrying the girl with her.

She landed her feet down gently onto the terrace.

Once she had been released, Connie faced the door, pondering what to do about the wooden boards.

"I'll take care of it," Peridot told her, once again in a cold and robotic tone, similar to one she had when they first met in this very spot.

Peridot rested a hand on the highest wooden board, which had been placed on the tip top of the door. She used her strength she'd built in time to tear it down; tear all of the boards down, through one clean sweep. She rested her hand on the handle, and threw the door open. This short, violent move set dust clouds flying through the room, across the floor.

"Well," the gem continued, in the same cold tone. "Go on. Go through the house. Is it not what you wanted from the beginning?"

Connie, with hesitance, stepped further into the room, one step at a time.

The floor, she noticed, was a mess. There were bent, empty cans of soda strewn and scattered about the floor, along with crumpled up papers and emptied bags that had formerly contained various foods.

There were also crinkled, stained shirts of Steven's on the floor as well, his red jacket included.

Peeking out of one of the jacket's pockets, was Steven's phone; screen cracked and covered in dust.

Connie bent down and pulled the phone out of the pocket. She wiped the dust from the screen, and pressed the power button. The lock-screen showed, and it was filled from top to bottom with notifications. Hundreds of notifications. She scrolled down with her thumb and read through every one. Some of the notifications had come from applications performing promotional stunts, but most of them were missed phone calls and text messages, about half of them having come from Connie herself.

This was indeed a phone that was no longer in use, most likely the phone of a dead person. She set the phone down on the jacket.

Connie picked up some of the crumpled pieces of paper, and opened them up, seeing if they had any writing on them.

All of the papers, as she read them, were drafts of his suicide note. His handwriting was as recognizable as ever. Words on the papers were scribbled out in black marker, with word "NO" written in all capitals below. One paper had been ripped in half.

...There was no use denying it now. This was him. This was Steven. All of this...all she had seen...it had all tied in with the information she had been given from Peridot. It was impossible to stage or fake something such as this. Steven... _he was gone_. Dead forever.

It was at this moment, that the tears finally started to come. As they poured down her face, Connie dropped onto her knees and began to sob quietly.

As she cried, Peridot approached her from behind, her large shadow over Connie growing smaller, the closer she crept.

She rested a gloved hand on the little girl's shoulder, and said, in a new tone of sympathy and care, "How about I take you back to your home? You must be very tired."

Peridot guided Connie out of the door and back into the van.

The whole way to her home, Connie gave every necessary direction Peridot needed to take.

Once they'd reached the Maheswaran residence, it was 10PM. As they stood outside the door, Connie heard a sound from Peridot. "Hrm."

"W-what is it?" Connie asked.

"All this talk we've had tonight," Peridot began. "And I've still yet to learn your first name."

"It's Connie," She replied. "My name is Connie."

"Hmm...it was nice to meet you, Connie," Peridot smiled.

Peridot threw off her hood, walked up the steps with Connie, and knocked on the door.

Out of the door, came the concerned faces of Doug and Priyanka Maheswaran.

"CONNIE!" Priyanka yelled in panic. "OH, COME INSIDE, HONEY! YOUR FATHER AND I HAVE BEEN WORRIED SICK!"

Once Connie had walked inside, Doug and Priyanka remained at the entrance. Priyanka scowled at Peridot. "... _You_. Are _you_ the same woman who called me earlier to tell me you were holding my daughter _HOSTAGE_?"

"I was _not_ holding your daughter hostage, Mrs. Maheswaran," Peridot explained. "You misunderstood me. She was injured, and I was merely tending to her wounds."

Connie popped her head through the door. "She's telling the truth, mom. She was nothing _but_ friendly to me the entire time I was there. She even fed me a meal."

"B-but," Priyanka said, attempting to rebuttal.

"Priyanka," Doug said softly, resting a hand on his wife's shoulder. "If Connie says this woman was nice to her, then it's the truth."

"You're right," She sighed. Priyanka then turned to face Peridot. "I'm very sorry for being so harsh with you, ma'am. Thank you for caring for our daughter."

Peridot pulled her hood back onto her head. "No need for thanks," she said, smiling. "It was the least I could do."

Peridot was halfway to the van before she had heard Priyanka speak again. "Ma'am, what is your name?"

She turned her head. "My name is Peridot."

"Peridot," Priyanka continued. "My husband, my daughter and I were talking, and we were wondering if you would like to stay at our house for the night. Would you?"

Peridot turned around completely, and took off her hood. "Are you sure?"

"Yes, we are. We do have the room for you to stay."

"...Alright, then. I'd be delighted."

She went in and they put her cloak away in a place where it'd be safe and secure.

They set up a bed of sorts for her on the couch, and Connie made sure to give her a "Thank You" hug before running off to bed.

Come midnight, the rain had ceased, and Peridot was lying on a couch in the Maheswarans' living room, curled up in a blanket, her head rested on a pillow.

She turned and stared up at the ceiling. She had no idea what had come over her earlier that night. She thought she'd been past her grief. That'd she'd become numb. Apparently, it wasn't true. She still cared. She couldn't stop herself from doing so.

Maybe it'd been more related to the fact that she felt directly responsible for Steven's death. Of all the deaths of her dear, dear friends, the guilt and grief from Steven's had struck her the hardest. She blamed herself. She blamed herself for not being there for him when he needed it. For being too caught up in her own emotions. But, she knew that she was lying to herself about this. She _had_ been there for him. She tried to lift his spirits with every fiber of her being. But in the end, it hadn't work a bit. She tried, and yet she had the gall to blame herself for not doing enough.

...Why?

Depression. Depression was the only answer to that question. It was like a beast. It was tearing at her from the inside. Telling her things that weren't true. Making her believe lies about herself. She thought herself some kind of monster, because her mind told her she was, and it hurt. It hurt oh so badly. Everyday, she dealt with it, and it made her tired.

...Sleep. She'd rarely tried sleeping. It felt refreshing every time she did so, though. Perhaps it was just what she needed after a day like this, but it was even more needed after months of depression.

Maybe Connie could become a new friend of hers sometime in the future. She wasn't sure. She was wary of the concept of friendship after what had happened to Steven and the other gems. The least she could do now was let the humans she knew live better lives than her own. The last thing she wanted was for innocent people to suffer.

But, at the moment, it wasn't time to dwell on the future, nor what was going on inside her mind.

Now was the time for her to close her eyes and drift off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There were some technical issues in the making of this chapter. I had to restart my computer.


	5. The Armory

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Connie visits Peridot the barn, and Peridot shows her a secret armory that she built underground.

Peridot began to get into the habit of sleeping after that one night she'd been allowed to stay at the Maheswaran residence. She never did have anything important to do these days, so she was free to do nothing but sleep inside the barn all day, if she wished to.

On one day, though, Peridot's slumber was interrupted by a rather loud and unexpected knock on the door.

She managed to pry herself away from the bed, and walk over to the barn door, but she did so very sluggishly.

The face of the knocker was revealed to be that of Connie Maheswaran.

"You're back, I see," Peridot grumbled. "What's your purpose for coming here?"

"Oh," Connie answered. "I don't think I really have one. I just wanted to check up on you, and...uh, I guess talk?"

"Well, you've 'checked up' on me, and we've talked. So, you can just leave now."

Before Connie could formulate a response the door was slammed in front of her. She knocked on it.

...No response.

She knocked on the door a second time, this time harder and faster.

...Still no response.

There was no response the third time, and there was no response the fourth time.

However, the fifth time around, the door finally opened, and out came a very, very displeased Peridot; a large frown on her face, and eyes bugging out with rage. "WHAT?" She shouted.

"Let me in, please," Connie requested.

"NO."

"Why not? I thought we were friends now."

Peridot stopped frowning, and her eyes returned to normal. She stepped back a bit and blushed. "I-I...uh."

She stopped herself at the beginning of her sentence and slammed the door in front of Connie once again. 

"PERIDOT!" Connie yelled, knocking on the door repeatedly. "PERIDOT, PLEASE! Why are you acting like this? You were so nice to me when we first met! Did I do something wrong?"

Inside, Peridot was standing up against the door, covering her face in shame. No, she was not like this when they'd first met. No, Connie hadn't done anything wrong. Peridot was the one to blame here. She wanted to befriend Connie, and get to know her as a person, but...after the deaths of Steven, Garnet, Pearl, and Lapis, her only friends, and... _Amethyst_ as well...Peridot was, to put it bluntly, scared. She was scared to let herself love again. She was scared to let herself share joy with a friend again. She thought that it would all be taken away from her like it was before, and she'd be in the same place she was when she'd lost Steven; terrified, wracked with guilt, and worst of all, suicidal. Peridot didn't even think she was able to love again. She thought that she'd be stuck like this forever; numb and guilty.

Peridot wanted to give Connie a chance, and make friends with her...but Connie. She was a human. She was mortal. She had an expiration date, and as Peridot was unaware of Connie's health, that date could be any time.  If Peridot wanted a friend, then she didn't want a friend who could die.

On average, a female human like Connie would live up to be 78 years old, possibly less. 6 to 7 decades would sound like an _eternity_ to a child like Connie, but it would feel like only _a week_ to an immortal gem like Peridot.

Connie could die at any time, and Peridot wasn't prepared to handle it.

After a while, she heard Connie shout from outside, "ALRIGHT! I'LL JUST LEAVE, THEN! I'M SO  _SORRY_ I WAS SO _STUPID_ TO THINK I FINALLY HAD A NEW FRIEND AFTER I LOST THE _ONLY_ ONE I HAD!"

...Was it a built selfish of Connie to guilt-trip Peridot like this? Perhaps it was. But, it had worked. Only a second later, Peridot had swung the door open and yelled after Connie. "WAIT! I'M SORRY!"

Connie had been facing away from Peridot, and was already walking away. She turned her head and pouted angrily at Peridot. "Really?" She asked. "You're not lying, are you?"

"Of _course_ I'm not," Peridot assured. "Please, come in."

Connie crossed her arms and marched right into the barn, with Peridot shutting the door and following her. She sat down on the bed, arms still crossed, pouting grumpily at Peridot.

"Now, now, Miss Maheswaran, no need to make faces," Peridot said, putting her palms together. "I was merely only joking! I wanted you to come inside from the beginning!"

Connie's eyebrows lowered further, and her pout became a long frown.

Peridot waited a minute for some kind of response before saying, "I said it was a joke. This is the part where you _laugh_ , darling. Do you need any help laughing?"

Connie finally spoke. _"That_ was your idea of a _joke?"_ She hissed. _"I_ didn't think it was funny _at all."_

Peridot had no idea what to say now. Her "clever" plan of saying her foul attitude from earlier had been a joke just failed, and she didn't have any kind of memory-erasing machine to make Connie forget what had just happened. Peridot had cookies, which were a fairly close substitute, but they were to most likely work better on a small, gullible toddler, rather than a young, sharp-witted teenage girl like Connie.

Peridot's only save was changing the subject.

She sat down on her knees. "So," she began. "How was your day? Got any gossip from that 'school' place humans your age travel to in the morning hours?"

"Today's _Saturday_ , Peridot," Connie replied exasperatedly. "I only go to school on Mondays through Fridays. Also, my day was just _fine_ until _now."_

...Running out of ways to change the subject, Peridot decided to go with her last resort; a temptation that nobody could refuse. "Would you like a cookie, Connie?"

Baffled at this sudden change of subject and tone, Connie waited a minute or so to respond, and when she finally did, it was with a low, grumpy "Okay."

Peridot picked up a green jar off of the counter and opened it up to show the inside. The jar was practically filled to brim with cookies, so much so that when Connie had picked one out, it had broken in half when pulled out.

"Is _everything_ that you own green?" Connie asked, while pulling the other half of the cookie out.

"No," Peridot responded, closing the jar. "I have some things that are yellow or purple."

Connie didn't reply to this, and instead chose to stare at Peridot and then bit begrudgingly into one half of the broken cookie.

Peridot put the jar back in it's proper place, and then went back to sit in front of Connie.

There was a moment of odd silence, as the two of them stared at each other; one disgruntled, and the other regretful.

"Listen, I," Peridot began. "I-I'm sorry. About earlier, I mean. I don't know why I acted like that to you, but, I promise I'll try not to do it again."

"It would've been better to say that right after I walked in, but thanks for apologizing," Connie said. "And uh...thanks for the cookie."

"Oh, you're so welcome! I baked them all myself!"

"You did a good job, then."

Connie looked around the barn for a minute.

"So," She started. "Is this all there is of the barn?"

"Oh no," Peridot stood up, pressing her hands together. "Not at all! I've built extra rooms, like a bathroom for humans to expel their waste in, my own private room, and...oh my goodness."

"What?" Connie asked.

"THE ARMORY!" Peridot yelled enthusiastically, throwing her arms in the air. "I HAVE TO SHOW YOU THE ARMORY!"

"You have an _armory?"_

"Well of course I do! Why would I yell about it like that if I didn't?"

Peridot pressed her hands together again. "Anyways, two weeks ago, I finished building the armory, and since then, I've been waiting for a human to come along to my barn so I could show them the armory in it's _full glory!_ Now, I've _finally_ found that human!"

She rested her hands on Connie's shoulders. "It's _you_ , Connie!"

Grabbing a hold of the little girl's hand, Peridot sprinted outside, dragging Connie with her along the way.

Connie had never witness anybody move as fast as this. She almost tripped multiple times while trying to keep up with Peridot.

They ran behind the barn, past the memorial, and stopped at a circular hatch in the ground.

The way to open the hatch appeared to be to turn the wheel-like handle clock-wise, and then counter clock-wise, because it was exactly how Peridot opened it.

Once the hatch was opened, Peridot jumped down the tunnel leading to the armory, Connie following after her.

Peridot landed safely on the floor of the armory. However, when Connie landed, she stumbled and fell on the floor.

Helping the little girl up, Peridot gestured out in to the darkness. "Behold, Ms. Maheswaran! MY ARMORY!"

Connie looked to where Peridot was gesturing.

...All she could see was a dark hallway.

"Um, Peridot," Connie said, squinting. "I can't see anything."

Peridot, finally noticing the darkness, flipped on a light-switch to her side. Guiding Connie further, she gestured out into armory. "Behold AGAIN, Connie! MY ARMORY!"

There were five rows of weapons. The first row had swords, different types of knives, and old-fashioned spears. The second row had a variety of weapons; nunchucks, small morning stars, packs of grenades, and spiked mallets. The third row had the former weapons of Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl, and in addition, Steven's shield and Rose's sword. The fourth and fifth rows had ranged weapons; bows and arrows, spiked boomerangs, slingshots, javelins, stylized cannons, and chakrams. The weapons of the armory were illuminated by lime green lights behind them, giving the place a dark, sinister feeling.

"Are those...the Crystal Gems' weapons?" Connie asked, pointing up at the third row.

"Technically," Peridot began to explain. "I rebuilt them. I added enhancements. I made them more _powerful_."

"How?"

Peridot reached up and grabbed the newly rebuilt version of Pearl's spear, and turn around to present it, holding it with both hands.

"Pearl's old spear can now, with the press of a button, summon three different types of blades, to make for more efficient attacks."

Peridot pressed a yellow button on the handle of the spear, and with the sudden growth of one hooked blade, the spear had become a scythe. The button was pressed again, and the hooked blade shrunk back in, and the tip of the spear flattened to form a chisel knife. Peridot pressed the button once more, and the blade sharpened and green flames erupted from it. Connie stepped back in fear. The button was pressed one last time, and the flames ceased. Two hooked blades grew from the sides of the spear, forming it into a trident. Once the spear was returned to its normal form, it was put back onto its shelf.

"The spear can also shoot lasers from a distance," Peridot added.

"What about the others?" Connie asked.

"Garnet's old gauntlet's are relatively the same, except they can now shoot lasers and bullets from the palm. Steven's shield works the same, and spikes can now be summoned on it's front. Steven's sword is the same. The whip can generate electricity and flames."

"Do you mean Amethyst's whip?"

"O-of course it's _that_ one," Peridot replied defensively, blushing. "Do you _see_ any other whip in here? _Hers_ is the only whip on Earth worthy of use."

Connie was taken slightly aback by this response, but didn't think too much of it. All she wondered was the reason for Peridot blushing at the mention of Amethyst's name. But, she wanted to reserve questions like that for a later time.

"So," She began. "What about all the other weapons?"

"Oh," Peridot responded casually. "They're typical Earth weapons. I just added my own original spin on all of them. Nothing too important to go over."

Peridot stared back up at the armory, specifically Amethyst's whip.

"...Um," She continued. "That's...all. There's nothing else to see here. Let's leave now."

Climbing a ladder that was pulled down with the press of a button, Connie and Peridot exited the armory. The opening to it was sealed.

A few seconds after the hatch was sealed, Connie saw Peridot sprint away.

Whatever was on that gem's mind that caused her to run away like that wasn't too much of a concern to Connie.

What Connie was truly concerned about was why Peridot had acted the way she did at the mention of Amethyst's name and whip.

In the past, before the deaths of Steven and the gems, had Peridot and Amethyst been involved in something _different_ from friendship?

 

 


	6. Mourning Children, Yearning Adults

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peridot and Connie talk to each other about their grief.

Ever since she'd learned of the deaths of Steven, the Crystal Gems, and Lapis Lazuli, Connie had been absolutely miserable. Her focus on her grief had begun to effect her school life. She'd arrive late after the first bell more often, because in the mornings she'd just remain in her bed after her alarm clock would wake her. She was never ready or willing to face the day. Connie began to fall asleep in class, something she'd never done. When woken up, she'd rush herself to complete the assignment, and when faced with a pressuring deadline of "at the end of class" and the end of the period bell ringing, she'd cry to herself at her desk. When in class, while the teacher was going over the lesson of the day, Connie would find herself wanting to listen, wanting to know what to do, but instead, she'd stare off into nothing, and world around her would seemingly disappear. All she would hear would be a static noise or ringing in her ears. Then, the bells for the next class would sound, and she'd be brought back to reality.

Then the bullying would begin. Kids would insult her for her panicking and grieving in class, tape hateful notes onto her locker, and worst of all, spread slanderous rumors about her, and sometimes even get physical with her.

On one day in particular, two girls were giggling together in the hallway, looking straight at Connie as she walked over to her locker. These girls were Valerie and Jasmine. Valerie was fairly tall, with pale skin and long, gingery red hair. She had a round, chubby face, complete with a body build of those same two features. Jasmine was shorter, with short, curly hair. In facial structure, complexion, and body build, Jasmine looked eerily similar to Connie. However, it was still simple to tell them apart. Jasmine had short hair and wore glasses with small rectangular frames and lenses. Connie had long hair, and wore no glasses at all.

When Connie began entering the combination to her locker, she heard Valerie call to her.

"Hellooo, Connie!" Valerie greeted in an sickeningly saccharine tone of voice. She sounded so sweet and cheerful that actually came off as more condescending and rude, rather than friendly.

"Um," Connie said, refusing to look at the two of them behind her. "Hi."

"Sooo," Valerie continued, in the same sugary voice as before. "Me and Jaz heard that you like someone!"

Connie turned to face them, blushing. "Wh-who?"

"Why," Jasmine began, with the same sweet tone as Valerie. "Melissa Johnson, of course!"

"Wait, what?" Connie asked, raising an eyebrow. "Melissa from Spanish class? I've only talked to her like, twice. I don't have a crush on her."

"Awww," Valerie cooed. "She's in denial!"

Connie lowered her brow and glared at the two girls. "I don't like Melissa. You guys are just spreading rumors."

Connie's voice had been at a perfectly audible volume, loud enough for the two of them to hear. She had also pronounced all her words correctly and clearly. However, despite this, Valerie and Jasmine acted as if Connie hadn't said anything at all.

"HEY, MELISSA!" Jasmine called out.

From a locker at the end of the hallway, a small, chubby girl with tan skin, large, dorky glasses, and short, curly hair had turned her head around, expecting to hear something new from the person that had called out her name.

"CONNIE MAHESWARAN HAS A CRUSH ON YOU!" Jasmine yelled, pointing right at Connie.

From the end of the hallway, Melissa blushed and smiled.

"R-really?" She asked.

All of the other children were either oohing, or murmuring and laughing about the current situation amongst themselves.

As the noise of the other students continued, and grew louder, Connie's patience and temper grew thinner. It had gotten to the point where, out of frustration and embarrassment, she shouted out "NO! STOP IT! STOP ALL OF IT! I DON'T LIKE HER! I NEVER HAVE AND I NEVER WILL!"

The hallway went dead silent. At the end, standing near her locker, Melissa's smile dropped, and tears filled up her eyes. She slammed her locker shut and ran away, around the corner of the hallway, sobbing loudly.

Every student turned their heads to stare at Connie. Some students were shocked, others were disgusted, and then there were students that were smug, Valerie and Jasmine included.

"Wow, Connie," Valerie sneered. "So harsh."

"Yeah," Jasmine smirked. "What a mean thing to say to poor old Melissa! Shame on you!"

Then, after that, the two of them had walked away from her, laughing together.

As if her grief over the loss of Steven was bad enough on it's own, Connie's grades were sinking to disastrous numbers. She had nobody at school to vent to, and the only people who would talk to her would be one of her peers, ready to bully her.

She wanted to tell her parents about everything, but...she couldn't work up the courage. She thought she would get in serious trouble for her failure in school, and her parents would ignore everything else, and she believed it, despite how much they did seem to care about her mental health and general well-being.

Each week now, she was never anticipating any day, not even Friday or the weekend. She was just waiting for an end. She was waiting for when all of this would just end. In this end, all of the bullying would stop abruptly, her grades would elevate to more acceptable numbers, her stress would melt away, and she'd finally feel some bit, or even just a tiny shred of happiness in her heart.

At the moment, in this point of her life, all Connie wanted was to see Steven again. She wanted to hold him, and tell him everything would be alright. She'd never gotten the chance to do it before his death. He'd been hurting deeply, and she never knew of it.

She could have saved him, if she'd just had the courtesy to visit his house more. She could have talked to him. She could have helped him get through his emotions, slowly and steadily. But, she'd never taken the time, and the guilt of it was gnawing at the insides of her soul for it.

The weekend finally rolled around, and Connie went to visit Peridot's barn a third time.

From outside the closed door, she could hear music being played, possibly from a stereo. It was specifically the song "Fantasy" by Mariah Carey.

...Connie was now less concerned about Peridot was handling her own grief and more concerned with why, of all the artists out there to listen to, she was listening to Mariah Carey. If Peridot was listening to cheesy pop songs from the 1990s, then she obviously was not handling her own grief very well. Or maybe, this was a part of how Peridot celebrated the weekends.

Connie knocked on the door. "Peridot? Are you in there?"

She waited a few seconds.

"It's open," Peridot shouted hoarsely from inside.

Connie pushed the door open, and closed it behind her.

The barn was now an absolute mess, unlike Connie had seen it before.

Cans of soda and emptied bags of food were scattered around the floor, food crumbs were everywhere, the cushions on the couch were either lopsided or thrown to the floor. On one of the cushions that laid on the floor, a stereo had been placed, and was indeed where the music was coming from. Next to the cushion, Peridot was lying face down on the floor on a pile of dirty blankets.

"Peridot?" Connie asked, crouching down next to her. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah," Peridot responded gruffly, her words muffled by the blankets. "I'm fine. This is just how I spend my weekends."

There was an awkward, silent pause between the two of them, before Connie asked another question. "Why are you listening to Mariah Carey?"

"Her music keeps me sane," Peridot responded in the same gruff tone.

Yet another pause.

"So," Connie asked, eyeing the cans of soda and emptied food bags on the floor. "You're eating? But Steven told me you can't shapeshift."

"I found a way to shapeshift internal organs," Peridot grunted, lifting herself up. "Can you pass me that?"

She pointed to a gray flask on the floor that was in front of Connie. Some drops of whiskey had fallen from it.

"You're drinking _ALCOHOL?"_ Connie yelled, throwing her arms up in the air as if this were a heinous crime. "That stuff can _SERIOUSLY_ damage your liver, though!"

"Only if you drink too much," Peridot added with frustration, getting up to retrieve the flask herself. "Also, I'm an alien. I can't exactly die from poor health conditions like humans can."

"Still," Connie replied. "I...don't think you should."

"Like I give a damn about the opinion of some 14 year old human child."

"HOW DO YOU KNOW HOW OLD I AM?"

"I'm not responding to that question," Peridot grumbled, as she opened the flask.

She took a swig of whiskey and closed the flask. "So, what did you come here for?" She smiled. "Perhaps...you wanted another look at the armory? I built that whole thing myself, you know. I even built the weapons."

"Okay, first of all, that's bull-honkey," Connie said. "I saw a price tag on at least two of the weapons you had in there. Second of all, I came to just...check on you. I was a little worried about you after my last visit."

"Well," Peridot responded, after taking another swig of whiskey from the flask. "I'm fine. You can stop worrying now. Also, you know you can just say 'bull-shit', right? I don't mind it if humans swear around me. Not if they're even children like you."

"My parents have a super strict policy about cursing," Connie answered. "I can't even say 'heck' around them."

"That sucks," Peridot told her, while walked over to turn the stereo off. "If I was your mother, I'd let you say 'fuck' anytime you wanted. I'd even let you say it in public, in front of adults and children." She searched for the pause button, and managed hit the pause button right at the moment the song "Underneath the Stars", a song also sung by Mariah Carey, ended.

"That's probably why I shouldn't ever become a parent," Peridot added, walking back over to Connie. "Not that I have the capability to. I can shapeshift all the internal organs I want to, but I'd _never_ have the patience to shapeshift a womb and go through pregnancy."

"I see you've made up your mind about _that_ already," Connie said, with a mildly uncomfortable expression. 

 _"So,_ going back to earlier topic," Peridot opened the flask again and took another swig from it. "Why were you worried about me after our last visit?"

"Well, uh," Connie explained. "It's because...you started acting strange."

"About what?" She took another swig.

"About...Amethyst?"

Peridot spit out the whiskey.

There was pause between their conversation for about a minute.

"Peridot," Connie started to ask. "Was there...something going on between you and Amethyst?"

Peridot didn't answer. Instead, she remembered. She went back to that time when they were building the drill together. The time when she and Amethyst told each other jokes in the Prime Kindergarten, but Peridot took it a step too far and accidentally insulted Amethyst for her defects. The time when Peridot broke free from the leash to jump out in front of a renegade drill and save Amethyst's life. The time when she landed on top of Amethyst, and they gazed into each other's eyes. The time when she had constructed that apology for Amethyst, word by word, and played it on her tape recorder. Peridot had meant every word of that apology, even to this day.

She remembered the time when the ruby soldiers came down to Earth, and Amethyst had been willing to destroy all of them to protect her. She remembered the time when Amethyst had been oh so eager to win her that prize at Funland. That stupid alien doll that Peridot had ripped the bowtie off of about a month or so later.

She remembered...Amethyst. Amethyst's smile. Amethyst's adorable laugh. Her lips, her hair, her eyes, her figure, _everything_ about her.

She remembered the time they spent alone at the barn. On top of the roof. The sun had set on a chilly autumn's day, and Peridot had rested her head on Amethyst's shoulder. They'd been peacefully watching the sky. Amethyst had pulled her closer, and said "I love you, Peri." Peridot just had to respond with the similar "I love you too." She remembered when they kissed, at that moment, when the sun had gone down, and cold winds of autumn were blowing around the air, and moving through Amethyst's thick, luxurious hair.

Then...Peridot remembered Amethyst's death. The cold destruction of her physical form, the violent crushing of her gem, and then...

"PERIDOT!" she heard Connie yell.

It was then that Peridot had been brought back from her mind into the cold, crushing reality. The reality where Amethyst was no more. Peridot felt her face, to make sure she was still real.

...Her cheeks were plastered with tears.

She looked at Connie. "W-what?"

"ARE YOU OKAY?" Connie asked, a new tone of stress in her voice.

"Uh," Peridot's voice faltered a bit. "Uh, yes, I...I just," She wiped away a tear. "I...zoned out for a little bit."

"That's what I was hoping," Connie said, her voice cracking a little bit.

"So," Peridot sniffled. "How's...life been for you lately?"

This sentence startled Connie quite a bit, to the point where she jolted upright and her eyes widened. She wanted to lie and say "good", but...she didn't want to. The last few weeks had been the roughest time for her in her whole life so far. She wanted to talk to Peridot, so she could get at least _some_ comfort, but...she didn't want to talk about her feelings. Not in the slightest. After a few minutes of thinking and the repeated "Connie?" from Peridot, she finally answered the question.

"My...my life's been, uh...not that good actually," Connie began. "My grades...in school...they've been slipping. A lot. I've...and I've...um...I've been having panic attacks in class. All the kids in my homeroom have been bullying me and...I want to tell my parents but th-they'll get mad and...I just can't really handle anything a-anymore and-" Tears started to pour down her face. "I just w-want to see Steven again...I-I never got to talk to h-him and..I wish I could've just hugged him a-and told him...everything...would be-" She hunched over and wiped her tears while she sniffled. "A-alright."

Peridot moved closer to Connie and, hesitantly, hugged her to her chest and stroked the little girl's hair as she cried.

"I-I just want to see him again," Connie whimpered.

"Connie," Peridot crooned, the same way a patient mother would to her crying child. "Shh. Shh. It'll be alright."

Her voice sounded...surprisingly gentle...and soothing. It was as if she had experience in calming down crying children.

Peridot stroked her hair once more. "Shh...Shh...It's okay...calm down."

It was genuinely surprising how patient Peridot was at this moment in comparison to her irritable attitude from earlier. She let Connie cry for so long...minutes upon minutes...and not once did she sigh out of frustration or say "Come on kid, chill out already." She tolerated Connie's crying with all of the gross tears and snot pouring onto her shawl, and the loud sniffling that would have driven any average bystander up the wall. Throughout this long session of comforting, Peridot maintained a uncomplaining, loving composure.

Once Connie had officially calmed down, she found that Peridot was still hugging her tightly and petting her like she was before.

"Uh, Peridot," Connie said. "You can...let me go now. I'm better."

Peridot let go, just as she was told, and Connie wiped away her tears. "Sorry I cried for so long, Peridot...I just...felt really bad."

"There's no need to apologize," Peridot replied in the same motherly tone she used while comforting. "If you ever need a shoulder to cry on, and you don't think anyone at school or in your family could be there, just come to me. I'll let you cry for as long as it takes for you to calm down."

There was a pause between the two of them for a minute or so.

"Would you like something to eat?" Peridot finally asked. "I could make the same thing I did for you when we first met."

"You don't have to," Connie responded. "I'm fine with just a few cookies."

"Okay, I'll go get the jar."

Peridot picked out the green cookie jar from the counter and dug inside to pick out four chocolate chip cookies. She walked back over and gave the four cookies to Connie.

She then turned around to go un-pause the stereo's music. She skipped a few songs and landed on the song "Always Be My Baby", which, like the other two songs she had played, was by Mariah Carey.

She finally sat back down next to Connie and began to hum along to the sound of the music.

As Connie bit into her first cookie, she thought about Peridot and what had just happened with her. What she'd gathered so far about Peridot from this and their previous encounters was that she's a rather grumpy and reclusive gem by nature, but she has a soft, motherly side to her personality that often shows when caring for an injured or emotional human. Unlike the other gems, Peridot seemed to have a strong respect for humans, sometimes bowing in their presence like they were royalty, or caring for their injuries in her barn, giving them food, medical treatment, and everything required to care for a human in physical trauma of any kind. She seemed to listen to music, something that none of the other gems, not even Amethyst would do that often. Whether this was her true self, or herself affected by grief over her losses, Connie didn't know. Steven had always described Peridot as "grouchy and mean at first, but super nice if you get to know her," but he'd never once mentioned her attitude towards humans. Maybe it wasn't that important. Maybe Connie was mistaken, and all Crystal Gems had a natural respect for humans like this. 

Only time would tell if Connie was to learn more about Peridot. At the moment though, what really mattered to her was finishing off the cookies that were oh so generously given to her by a friend, and jamming out to cheesy pop songs from the 1990s.


End file.
